Monday, November 30, 2009
Sunday, November 29, 2009
It's Sunday morning and I couldn't sleep in. I woke up with old memories pounding on my brain, and once I had all but hushed those away, saying to myself "don't look back today, charge ahead", what quickly followed was... worry. About the list. The list of things I "need" to do, want to do, must do. The list that will never end, and that most days, I get only a fraction of done. I could and sometimes do feel a lot of guilt over whether I am creating enough art, doing enough around the house, keeping in touch with friends and family enough, making enough money, all of that. My challenge today is to not only strike a few things OFF the list, but to relax into the fact that it's okay if I don't get it all done. It will still be here tomorrow! :)
Thursday, November 19, 2009
How many moments in life leave you thinking, "This is big, everything will be different after this"? I have been fortunate enough to have many of those experiences, whether they be the death of my mother when I was eight, or tragic events during my childhood and adult life, meeting incredible people, or having profound spiritual experiences. In particular, I can say that the past year has been huge for me. Whether it's just that I am ready for more now, being older now, and more mature, or whether things have simply reached a critical mass, I have had a sequence of moments and events that have completely changed my view of LIFE, what it is, what my purpose is, what GOD is, and how I feel about living and about dying. I am now, in the wake of the past year and all it's financial impact, my dear friends dying and getting sick before my eyes, my own self-discovery, seeing my life as new and realizing that now is the moment to really take stock and seize every precious drop of joy and experience that I can while I am here. I am somehow, after a life of insecurity, of self-doubt and confusion, realizing that I am in fact, blessed with huge talents, with an open and loving heart and with health, and I have got to use it all now, while I can. I am making a promise, a vow to myself to LOVE me, to celebrate me, and to embrace all that I am. A mother, a friend, a wife, an artist, a singer, a writer, a designer, a creative, vibrant force. A quirky, complicated, sometimes sad, sometimes giddy, fault-laden, really very kind, but sometimes awkward and lonely, incredibly creative spirit having a human experience.
Monday, November 16, 2009
A crazy busy weekend at Hands-on 3rd, with two birthday parties and a gallery event. Pooped, but it went really well. Today I am playing serious catch up and wondering how 1pm got here so fast. I have a movie poster, a baking company logo, about 100 photos to edit, a mural and some follow up emails and a conference call at 3pm! And I am not really working much - this isn't actually "really busy" LOL...
Thursday, November 12, 2009
Sitting in the house alone, loving this quiet time before picking up my son, and before my husband gets home. I am tossing around ideas in my head for some boots I am painting tonight. Made some good decisions today. Feeling happy and content. My son will come home and want to play Connect Four - a game we both love and we will. Then we'll have some dinner, play another game, read a book, he's off to bed, I get some time with my husband, some Hands-on 3rd stuff done and then I paint. YUM!