Wednesday, November 20, 2013

Yesterday was terrifically sobering.  I felt I was acutely aware of how in a moment, a peaceful life can be flipped upside down, if only briefly. There was literally an onslaught of bad news, upset and anger coming at me from so many directions that I folded in on myself.  Something I haven't felt in years.  This morning I am wrung out and exhausted. 

I share this because even our "worst" days can give us the gift of growth and in looking for that, this is what came to me as I meditated on how to pull out of this dark fog: 

It is all too easy to assume our hurt, anger, or discomfort is the only wound in the world in the moment, and that the person or persons who affected our state of mind, who made a mistake and upset our life in some small manor should be both berated and punished. In our need to be right we forget that everyone is fighting a battle of some kind. In our upset we think that somehow casting blame on another and making them feel the level of our unease will make us feel better. And yet, in laying another person open in order to achieve some kind of rightness and throw the hurt or anger back onto them, we only diminish ourselves. This is a strong lesson for me and perhaps it took having a really hard day to remind me to pay attention to this in myself to be more mindful towards others, and in others by not taking their anger personally.

I spent some time this morning sending nothing but pure love to everyone I encountered yesterday, everyone involved in what felt like a tornado of misunderstanding and hurtful choices.  Including me.  I needed it.